Days Eighteen through Twenty

A tragedy always seems to bring family together. When I was on the plane coming home late Thursday night, I got a call from my Grandmother that she was in town. My grand-aunt Marie was on life support. It appeared she was losing her longtime battle with cancer so my grandmother came with her sister and niece and nephew and sure more will be on the way. I always hold out 4 hope, but it's not looking too great.

Saturday I spent some time with my grandmom and mom and sis and aunt T - we went 2 lunch (and had the gayest waiter on earth! My grandmother said he had a "swish" - 2 funny, fucking excellent service though) and went to visit some new Baltimore transplants in the family - my uncle Willy and Aunt Kitty. Willy is 90 years old and still has a youthful fire and spark that rivals any 20 year olds! Absolutely amazing!

Me, my uncle Willy and aunt Kitty

My whole world ... mom and sis

When I was ten, my grandmother died of cancer. She was only freshly 48. I don't remember a lot from my childhood oddly enough, but that time of my life I have certain memories that are extremely vivid. I can recall her funeral so clearly ... visiting her in Sinai when she was sick ... the smell of that place ... that uneasiness ... the mother of 7 kids and absolutely beloved by everyone that knew her ... it seemed like everyone's world was being ripped apart ... including mine. That's the last death I've experienced of someone close to me, thank God! My grandfather died a couple of years ago and it was so sad, of course, but we just weren't that close. My heart goes out to my grandmother's brother and his family and everything they must be going through. I simply can't imagine what it would feel like today to lose someone close to me. I am so incredibly blessed. I know we all gotta go someday, but that's why I want so feverishly to enjoy life as much as I possibly can. That's what this 30 day countdown to 30 was supposed to exemplify in a roundabout way, but I feel like I've been failing. One thing it's definitely shown me is just how much time I waste! It's amazing. If anything I'll learn 2 manage time better. But it's always the little stuff I don't write about that sometimes is so much more meaningful.

One thing I can definitely start managing my time better with is my business which has suffered from my neglect of late. I got a little reminder of this when I went to my friends' Adam and Denyse's housewarming late on Saturday. They are 2 of my business partners and they have been extremely successful and are some of my role models in the business. Adam is actually younger than me, but he's been doing it for three years and I've just completed my first. I can definitely see things happening which is great ... can't wait 4 that next $900 check to come in ... sure will come in handy now!

The pregnant happy couple w/daughter

The key is to do a little bit, 30 minutes work, every day and I know that ... sometimes I just don't do it, LOL. If you're reading this and still don't know what business I'm referring to, send me a note and I'll happily tell u all about it cuz anyone with a beating heart and a mouth can do it, brain is only half necessary, ambition is the most important ingredient.

So, on Sunday I basically wasted another day. I spent 3 hours unpacking the storage closet so I can pull out my winter clothes since it's starting to get cold. I have a LOT of fucking sweaters! My room is nowhere big enough to hold all my clothes ... yet ANOTHER reason I know I'm a card-carrying rainbow boy!

"We're celebrating no more drama in our lives." - Mary J. Blige, Family Affair

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